This June 26 marks the 10th anniversary since LGBTQ Americans won the federal right to marry via the U.S. Supreme Court’s Obergefell v. Hodges ruling. Apart from allowing same-sex couples to secure rights for their families, many queer and trans people say the decision resulted in more societal acceptance for not just LGBTQ families but the community at large.
“It is becoming more accepted. Folks don’t question it anymore; it is just a part of life,” said lesbian El Cerrito City Councilmember Rebecca Saltzman about people’s reaction to her being married to her wife, Caitlin Stone, with whom she has a 5-year-old daughter. “I do feel like there is a sense of more – I am not sure if the right word is normalization – there are less sort of awkward conversations about whether I have a husband or a wife, especially now that I have a kid.”
People on occasion will still assume her spouse is a man, noted Saltzman, which coincidentally occurred when she was at her dentist office Wednesday morning a few hours prior to being interviewed by the Bay Area Reporter. She was talking to a new dental hygienist about their both having children, and the woman just automatically asked Saltzman something about her and her husband without thinking about it, she recalled.
“She was assuming because I am also a mom, I must have a husband. It stood out because it doesn’t happen that often anymore,” Saltzman said, chalking it up to the fact that over the past 10 years so many same-sex couples have not only wed but also became parents. “Again, it is so accepted. Everybody knows same-sex couples who have married; they are a part of most folks’ families.”
The East Bay politico is not alone in feeling that way. Two-thirds of LGBTQ adults in the U.S. say the Obergefell decision made people more accepting of same-sex couples, according to a new survey the Pew Research Center is releasing Thursday ahead of Pride Month’s official start this Sunday, June 1.
“Among LGBTQ adults who are in a committed same-sex relationship, similar shares of those who are married and those who are not say the ruling has made the country more accepting of same-sex couples (69% vs. 64%),” Pew found in its 2025 “The Experiences of LGBTQ Americans Today” survey. “However, those in a same-sex marriage are more likely than those who are in a same-sex relationship but not married to say Obergefell has made the country a lot more accepting of same-sex couples (26% vs. 17%).”
About three-quarters (74%) of LGBTQ adults with at least a bachelor’s degree told Pew the ruling has made the country more accepting of same-sex couples. Just two-thirds of those who had attended some college and 57% of those with a high school diploma or less education felt similarly.
The Pew researchers also found a difference of opinion depending on a person’s political affiliation. LGBTQ adults who are Democrats or lean Democratic are more likely than Republicans and Republican leaners to say Obergefell made people more accepting of same-sex couples (70% vs. 55%), according to the survey.
“The difference is mostly driven by the shares saying the ruling has made the country somewhat more accepting of same-sex couples. Half of LGBTQ Democrats say this, compared with 39% among LGBTQ Republicans. There’s a much smaller difference between the shares saying Obergefell made people a lot more accepting (21% vs. 17%),” according to the survey authors.
Some continue to hide relationships in public
Despite LGBTQ adults feeling more acceptance for their relationships, many with a partner of the same sex told Pew they continue to take steps to hide their sexual orientation in public. The survey found that 57% avoid showing affection to their spouse or partner in public where they live “at least sometimes,” with 28% saying they do it “extremely or very often.”
When talking to people they don’t know, 46% of LGBTQ adults say they avoid mentioning their spouse or partner “at least sometimes, with 20% saying they do this extremely or very often,” according to Pew. The rates were similar no matter if the respondents lived in urban, suburban, or rural areas.
Pew surveyed 3,959 LGBTQ adults in mid-January, with the margin of sampling error plus or minus 2.2 percentage points. The survey purposefully oversampled transgender adults and gay, lesbian, or bisexual adults who are married or living with a partner.
Twenty percent said the Obergefell decision has made people a lot more accepting of same-sex couples, according to the nonpartisan, nonadvocacy fact tank. About a quarter (24%) told Pew that Obergefell made people neither more nor less accepting, while 9% feel it made them a lot or somewhat less accepting of same-sex couples.
“The decision, which represented a major change in U.S. family law, reflected shifting public opinion on same-sex marriage. In 2004, 31% of Americans supported it, while 60% opposed,” noted Pew. “By 2015, 55% supported same-sex marriage, while 39% opposed. And support has continued to grow: In 2023, 63% of Americans expressed support for same-sex marriage.”
In analyzing the results from its survey of LGBTQ Americans, Pew researchers also used data from a separate survey of 4,740 U.S. adults who are not LGBTQ. That data was collected as part of a larger survey of U.S. adults conducted in mid-February.
Some sense of social progress
“In broad strokes, the survey finds some sense of social progress, as well as a feeling that acceptance will continue to grow. But it also highlights experiences with discrimination, especially among transgender adults,” reported Pew. “And it underscores the diversity of experiences across and within LGBTQ groups – from coming out, to navigating public spaces, to connecting with a broader LGBTQ community.”
According to Pew, 61% of LGBTQ adults say there’s at least a fair amount of acceptance for people who are gay or lesbian, with about half (52%) saying the same for bisexual people. But the survey found far fewer saying there’s “a great deal or fair amount of acceptance” for nonbinary (14%) or transgender (13%) individuals.
And the survey found differences in opinion for how much acceptance had grown since 2015 for the different sexual orientations and gender identities included under the LGBTQ acronym. Gays and lesbians saw the most increase, according to the respondents, with 82% saying there’s been “a lot or somewhat more acceptance today than 10 years ago” for that group. For bisexuals, 76% felt they had more acceptance from a decade ago, while 66% felt similarly for transgender people and 64% felt the same for nonbinary people.
“Most LGBTQ adults say there is more acceptance today compared with 10 years ago of each of these groups. And majorities expect there to be even more acceptance 10 years from now,” the Pew survey found.
The researchers added that, “Even among those who say there isn’t much acceptance for these groups, majorities see more acceptance than in the past. Looking ahead, majorities also expect there to be even more social acceptance for these groups in the future.”
The survey’s lead author Rachel Minkin, who is gay and has been a research associate with Pew since 2020, told the B.A.R. those optimistic views about the next 10 years are not solely confined to gay, lesbian, and bi people.
“We do see majorities say they expect to see more acceptance for all the groups, including transgender people,” said Minkin, stressing she was part of a team at Pew who worked on the survey.
Rather than worried about seeing flagging support for marriage equality in coming years, Saltzman told the B.A.R. she has more concerns about the backlash toward the transgender community, including how even those supportive of same-sex marriage in the past are now wavering when it comes to trans rights. She pointed to California Governor Gavin Newsom, a Democrat who won plaudits for bucking state law when he was mayor of San Francisco in 2004 and ordered city officials to wed same-sex couples.
Yet, this year, he has called the participation of transgender athletes in gender-based sports competitions “unfair.” On Tuesday, Newsom expressed support for a decision by a statewide athletic council to allow cisgender girls displaced by transgender athletes to still compete this weekend in the state track and field championships and not have a trans athlete winning a medal “displace” a cisgender girl’s standings in the competition.
“The transgender community is being attacked left and right,” noted Saltzman, adding there needs to be a greater response in support of trans people from the wider community, both on a political and social level. “We need to stop that and start going forward again and not backwards again.”
Pew last conducted a similar survey with LGBT adults in 2013. It also held several focus groups in 2022 to explore the experiences of transgender and nonbinary adults, and regularly asks Americans about their views on various LGBTQ issues in its surveys.
Minkin told the B.A.R. it is too soon to say if Pew will release a similar survey on the 20th anniversary of the Obergefell decision. The research center is cognizant of the lack of data on LGBTQ Americans and the need for inclusion of questions around sexual orientation and gender identity in its surveys, she added.
“It comes up, as we see a real gap in knowledge about the experiences and views of LGBTQ Americans,” said Minkin. “It had been so long since Pew’s last survey with LGBTQ adults in 2013, we wanted to know where things were today and kind of get at new questions and new understandings of LGBTQ adults and what are their experiences today.”
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