As a 10-year-old in Mexico City, Laura Espinosa confessed to her mother that she was in love with an older woman. Her mother was outraged, and Espinosa realized that in order to be happy, she would have to leave home. She sold tamales and washed cars for a year to save up money to move to America. At 11, Espinosa traveled to the United States in the back of a rag truck with other undocumented immigrants.
She worked in the fields and made her way north, washing dishes and bussing tables. At Josef's Restaurant in Santa Rosa, she worked 12-15 hour days, seven days a week for over 11 years, working her way up to the position of sous chef. She studied English as a second language, got her green card, and eventually became a U.S. citizen.
"I always wanted to become a citizen because every job that I had, someone in authority would threaten to call immigration or to fire me because of my citizen status," explained Espinosa, 42, who identifies as lesbian. "So I knew that if I didn't become an American, I would always hear the threats of being deported or I would be made to do something I didn't want to do."
Espinosa has been with her partner, Dolores Caruthers, who identifies as bisexual, for 14 years. They met at Aunt Ruby's, a gay bar in San Rafael. "She asked me to dance three times that night and the third time I said to myself, 'I should check this person out,'" explained Caruthers, 52.
Caruthers grew up in Port Jervis, New York, and moved to the Bay Area in 1980 when her husband was assigned to the San Francisco field office of the United States Park Police. She separated from her husband, Earl Caruthers, with whom she has two children, just before meeting Espinosa. Caruthers and Espinosa live in Novato next door to Caruthers's husband. "We are a family, the five of us together," Caruthers said, referring to herself, Espinosa, her husband and their two children.
Espinosa and Caruthers will represent their family and community as grand marshals in this Sunday's LGBT Pride Parade. For the last seven years, Caruthers and Espinosa have been hosting friends, families, and passersby at the San Francisco Pride Parade in what they call "The Compound," a canopy tent they set up on the day of the parade on the corner of 1st and Market streets. They honor parade participants with signs that express their support and thanks, as well as refreshments and rainbow leis.
This year, the compound will be set up as usual, and run by their daughter, Danyelle. "We will still set the compound up at 6 a.m. as always. � This will be our first time actually being in the parade. We have had so many opportunities to march and we have always declined because the compound is the best way to see and view everything," said Caruthers.
Longtime activists fighting for peace, marriage rights, and equality for all people, Caruthers and Espinosa were very pleased to be named community grand marshals.
"The reaction to being selected was overwhelming – pride, tears, and lots of screaming and hugs all around," explained Caruthers.
The organizations with which they work to help further equality include Marriage Equality USA, Spectrum Center for LGBT Concerns, the AIDS Project, Triangle Alliance of Marin, Marin NOW, Multicultural Commission of Marin, Peace and Justice Coalition in Marin, and the Colon Cancer Alliance. They helped organize Hands Across Marin, which protested the invasion of Iraq. Caruthers and Espinosa have served on the Multicultural Commission of Novato as liaisons to the gay community. They also helped coordinate the No on 22 campaign in Marin in 2000. Proposition 22, which was approved by state voters, prevents California from recognizing same-sex marriage. Sixty-one percent of California voters voted to approve the initiative. In Marin County, over 62 percent of voters voted against it.
Despite their support for marriage equality, Caruthers and Espinosa are unable to marry for reasons other than the fact that same-sex marriage is illegal in California. Caruthers is still married to her husband because of his health benefits, and a major financial loss would occur if they divorced. Caruthers has faced two major health crises in the last decade. In 2001, she was diagnosed with colon cancer and underwent surgery. In 2002, she shattered her ankle and required four more surgeries.
"If I had not remained married, I would not have been able to afford to get the care that I had received," said Caruthers.
The two were in San Francisco City Hall when the first gay marriage ceremonies took place in 2004. They had a commitment ceremony, attended by 125 friends and family members, on June 28, 1997. Earl Caruthers helped decorate and coordinate the event.
Caruthers and Espinosa continue to believe in the fight for marriage equality. During the "Winter of Love" in 2004, Caruthers served as a marriage commissioner and married same-sex couples in San Francisco's City Hall. In addition, they both traveled on the National Marriage Equality Caravan in 2004, with 46 other gay activists. The bus crossed the United States, stopping for demonstrations and events on the way to a large rally in Washington, D.C.
"We are politically active because everyone should be," explained Caruthers. "When you see something that is wrong, then you work hard to change it and if you can't change it on your own, then you get other people who think the same way to help begin the change. Why not be politically active? We couldn't imagine being anything else."