Tis the season to give DVD sets and Netflix and sit around watching TV while eating yummy holiday treats. The gym will still be there post-holiday. If you spent the fall season ignoring TV for different trivial pursuits, then let us help you decide what to catch up on and what to avoid when things start back up again in January.
The worsts often seem easier to cull than the bests, but we'll leave those for last, especially since the mass shooting of 20 little children in a Connecticut elementary school falls into that category.
Let's start with The Bests, the things that make us want to turn on the tube, rather than the things that make us dread seeing what might be next.
The Best of what we want from TV is Shonda Rhimes. In 2012, Rhimes gave us a strong adult, already-out-of-the-closet gay male couple in a front-burner storyline on a major primetime dramatic series on network TV with ABC's Scandal. Rhimes also has the longest-running lesbian couple on primetime on Grey's Anatomy. Both couples are interracial as well. And the lesbian couple has a child. All four characters have solid careers, are interesting and believable, and show physical affection onscreen. These are strong characters with careers, friends and real love in their lives. They are compelling and realistic, and we care about them.
We've mentioned Rhimes in recent columns (as we have previously noted Ryan Murphy for his shows on Fox and now NBC and FX. He was one of our bests last year). Here's why Rhimes' shows should be on your TBW (to be watched) list: She rocks. Case in point: on Dec. 12, she was asked the following: "Love your shows, but why all the gay and lesbian storylines?"
Rhimes responded, "Because I believe everyone should get to see themselves reflected on TV. Everyone. And because I love all my gay and lesbian friends. And because I think same-sex marriage is the civil rights fight of our era, and back when being a person of color was the civil rights fight, people like Norman Lear put black people on TV and helped change some minds. So, you know, it's gotta be paid forward. As long as we are willing to sit by while one person is not free, none of us are free."
Rhimes didn't let the questioner off the hook, either. "Because as long as someone feels like it is okay to ask the question, 'Why all the gay people on your shows?' then there is still a huge problem that needs to be solved. It's like asking, 'Why all the black people on your shows?' Which is, in fact, why there are also a lot of people of color on my shows. Because people keep asking. Like it's unusual. Which means we have a long way to go. Okay, done preaching."
While Rhimes might be preaching with this statement (which was like a big fat Christmas present to GLAAD for educating the homophobic masses), she doesn't preach in her shows. LGBT people are a natural part of the landscape �" not walk-ons, not dropped in, not people we've never encountered in real life, not wait, here's a gay person �" we're inclusive! Instead they are people we know, people who make us feel represented, exactly like Rhimes said. So Rhimes and her shows Scandal and Grey's Anatomy, they are on our "best" list because not only are these shows smart, compelling and entertaining (and Scandal is a superb political thriller), they also look like America: men and women, white people and people of color, straights and queers.
Ryan Murphy was a little off his game this year �" perhaps he had too many fingers in too many pies, we aren't sure. But despite the fact that it nearly roller-coastered right off the TV grid, Glee still has moments of sheer, well, glee that make us believe there really is a Santa Claus and that he's going to bring all the good little boys and girls growing up queer a high school like McKinley. His Dec. 13 Christmas montage was a case in point: Glee at its queerest and most musical best.
American Horror Story: Asylum is the jewel in Murphy's tiara this season. And while the ratings make it clear that AHS might be one of those "best shows you're not watching," that doesn't make it any less good. Last year's season of AHS wasn't great. We actually thought the show might be cancelled, but then we remembered that cable isn't network, so of course it came back. AHS is not a show for everyone, to be sure. It can be borderline pretentious, and if it catches you at the wrong time, you might hate it. But it's got style for days, true anomie-laden horror, and out-queer Zachary Quinto in the lead. It also is incredibly unsettling. It's a show that should be on everyone's Top 10 list for 2012.
Other contenders for Best dramatic series TV are Boardwalk Empire, Homeland, The Good Wife, Game of Thrones, Downton Abbey, Last Resort, The Hour, The Newsroom and Revolution .
Absent from our Top 10 best dramas list are the usual cable suspects like Mad Men, Breaking Bad and Justified. We recognize that these are well-acted shows with solid writing, but they don't move us. (Sorry, Jon Hamm and Brian Cranston.) And that is a quality we demand from TV: it's got to make us feel. We've written about all of our "bests" over the past year, but one thing they all have in common as dramas is morality. We don't use that word the way the Right does �" it's not a stick to beat others into some sort of submission. Rather it is about seeing the human condition illumined in ways that we don't usually see. That happens consistently on each of our Top 10 dramas �" one of which, Last Resort, has sadly been cancelled by ABC, but will run out its episodes through early 2013.
Andre Braugher will likely be overlooked (again) for Best Actor at the Emmys, but his portrayal of Captain Marcus Chaplin in Last Resort is brilliant and deserves notice. Braugher portrays Chaplin as a man torn between his integrity and fealty to country and his own damaged soul. As Braugher plays him, Chaplin can be tough enough to demand his own men be lashed �" and watch as they are �" and break down at the thought of losing one of those same men.
Meanwhile, the show itself is a political thriller on a par with Homeland. And were it on cable instead of one of the hatchet networks, it would be given another season. ABC did promise it would get a series finale, however, when it cancelled the show in late November. It's a show that deserves to be seen; all episodes can be viewed at ABC.com.
The reasons we like Last Resort are the same reasons Homeland and The Good Wife resonate for us. More of that Good vs. Evil thing, with all the gray areas making it difficult to figure out True North on one's moral compass. Homeland makes us think about what government �" as well as terrorism �" can inflict on people, and what it takes to make things right in the world we now live in. The Good Wife deconstructs the law with a capital L, and how it impacts all of us in ways we never even think about. Both these shows pit structure against anarchy �" not just in society, but in our personal relationships. These shows are what we used to call "must-see TV" because while they are certainly entertaining, they peel back the layers of who we are as humans and show us where we could and should go, but rarely have the courage to do so. Both shows have very strong female leads, and The Good Wife has one of the best queer characters on the tube (as well as several other queer characters) and has also repeatedly told strong queer stories.
Downton Abbey and Boardwalk Empire are about history as well as story with a capital S. Yes, they are period pieces, but they are also of a period �" they are microcosmic worlds apart from our own. It's no wonder they are so addictive, even the First Lady could hardly wait for the next season.
Game of Thrones and Revolution are about power and struggle and the end of the world as we know it, whether in the fictional world of Game of Thrones or the dystopian one of Revolution. What would we do if we had to fight �" literally �" for everything we believe in and want and thought we already had? These shows are both incredibly good.
Put espionage and journalism together and you have The Hour and The Newsroom. These shows are more subtle than the big-picture series like Boardwalk and Downton, but they are immensely compelling, and they get what journalism is and can be.
The Top 10 best shows are not always the shows we are most drawn to, of course. There are always the guilty pleasures and the comedies and the just plain feel-good shows. The best guilty pleasure shows of the season are Revenge and Nashville. These are primetime soaps that are incredibly well-acted and -written. And Revenge, the perfect DVD stocking stuffer, has central queer characters. The soundtrack to Nashville, which could make anyone love country, is another great stocking stuffer.
The best comedy this year? Modern Family, yet again. And not just because it's just so gay. It's just so funny. But so is Suburgatory: more angst, more emphasis on the teen years, but really compelling comedy. And some gay, too, of course. And then there's The Big Bang Theory, which is not gay, but does showcase the comedic and Emmy-winning talents of out gay comedian Jim Parsons. The B�" in Apt. 23 is also one of the funniest sitcoms on the tube and does gay every week �" swishy gay, but funny gay.
Once again SNL nabs a "best" for political and social satire. We think Mitt Romney lost the election all on his own, but certainly the brilliant sketches with Jason Sudekis' perfect portrayal (can anyone forget his Romney drowning his sorrows in milk?) were up there with Tina Fey's almost scary-perfect portrayal of Sarah Palin in 2008.
Another reason SNL lands on our "best" list is Kate McKinnon. Her pitch-perfect portrayals of Ann Romney and Martha Raddatz during the election had us ROFLAO. McKinnon is also the first out queer member of the SNL cast in 27 years and the show's first lesbian ever. (She was previously on The Big Gay Sketch Show. And lest anyone want to say, "What about Danitra Vance?, yes, she was a lesbian, but that was only revealed after her untimely death.) So McKinnon and SNL? Best, best, best.
Jon Stewart has to get a best for comedy, but also for talk-show host and pundit. We can't think of anyone we more enjoy listening to about politics. Or who seems to get it right more often. The Daily Show really is a daily dose of reason in an irrational world, yet presented in pants-pissingly funny style.
David Letterman is no Jon Stewart, nor does he pretend to be. But we give Dave a best for night-time talk-show host because, while Craig Ferguson might be gayer and even funnier, Dave does a thing that no other night-time talk-show host does: He skewers the asshat Right over and over again. He does it with humor, he does it with face slaps to conservative guests, he does it in stone-cold sober monologues. Dave invites far right ideologues like Rand Paul on his show just so he can call them out. And we love it. Romney never did go on Letterman �" perhaps he was warned. But not appearing turned out to be worse, since Letterman skewered him nightly for not coming on and did little skits about the no-show. And so a best for Letterman.
News bests
On the journalistic side of the tube, sans humor, especially in an election year, some news programs were just worthier than others. We have to mention Rachel Maddow, because even when we find her ideology tiresome, she's still always going to be the smartest girl in the room �" and the only lesbian as well.
And of course Maddow brought us Nate Silver, the gay statistical genius. On election night on MSNBC Maddow declared, "You know who won the election tonight? Nate Silver." Silver was a best in political analysis during the election season. He blew us away.
Another best: ABC's senior correspondent Martha Raddatz for being the only debate moderator who understood her job. She was a stellar moderator for the vice presidential debate and come 2016, she should be called to be the moderator for every debate.
Another best for TV journalism goes to Fox News. Wait �" what???? Yes, we said it. Fox News is better than any other network or cable news at what they do: totally biased, blatantly faux-fact reportage. Without Fox could there be �" or would there even need to be �" a Maddow or an Anderson Cooper or a Martha Raddatz? No. Fox is what puts the rest of TV news in perspective. If election night didn't prove that, with Karl Rove practically foaming at the mouth as Ohio went for Obama (and honestly, we said for months Ohio was going for Obama, and we didn't invent Silver's statistical metrics, but the writing was on the wall), we don't know what could.
Thus Fox is on our best list: best at keeping us aware that sexism, racism, homophobia and fear are still what drive a literal half of the population, and for reminding us that even when Republicans pretend to be moderate just-plain-folks, they are really rabid dogs waiting to spring and tear your throat out.
There are other bests that best Fox in the news department, of course, because that Fox best is a category all its own. BBC World News gets our best for reporting the news America forgets is actually news �" like what's happening in the rest of the world that isn't, you know, U.S. Or reporting American news stories that America doesn't deem worthy.
Another best goes to NBC anchor Brian Williams for taking down Donald Trump on election night with the most skillful dismissal, letting out a deep sigh and referencing "Donald Trump, who has driven well past the last exit to relevance." Not since Dorothy Parker has there been such a lovely little put-down.
CBS Evening News anchor Scott Pelley gets our best for remembering there are wars going on and that people are dying daily �" and not just in mass shootings at elementary schools.
ABC gets our best for their extraordinary coverage of Hurricane Sandy and the aftermath that has yet to recede �" it's difficult to comprehend that as we write this, 30,000 people are still without power as a result of the storm that slammed millions, leaving thousands permanently homeless this holiday season. Sam Champion, ABC's chief meteorologist and also an out queer, gets our "best" for being out and proud while in the eye of the hurricane.
The Networks that aired the 12.12.12 Concert get a best, as do the performers, because that was one slamming concert and raised millions for relief for those impacted by the natural disaster which affected more people than any other in U.S. history, even Katrina, although with less loss of life, fortunately.
60 Minutes gets our best for remembering what investigative journalism is and utilizing it every week, as on the Dec. 9 show, which detailed an unnerving case about forced false confessions and a group of men who spent 15 years in prison for a rape/murder they didn't commit predicated on a false confession. One of the young men, just 16 at the time of his incarceration, had his mother die while he was in prison. His only relative. Or Leslie Stahl's report on the hideous traffic in endangered tortoises. Crime syndicates have evolved to poach and steal these animals, the longest living animals on earth, to traffic to China and other parts of Asia, where the market for them is huge.
As for reality TV, which we despise, yet can't look away from, The Amazing Race on CBS gets our best for always having a queer couple we can root for on the show. On the incredibly gripping two-hour season finale Dec. 9, the gay goat-farmers Josh and Brent won in a total upset of the final three, and it was indeed amazing. Wow!
We'd also add to our bests The Voice, America's Got Talent, Master Chef, Hell's Kitchen and Dancing with the Stars for spotlighting queers with talent on reality TV.
There were some other individual moments in shows we don't think are among TV's best, but which have done unusual things that we found compelling and thus rate a sort-of best. Private Practice, another Shonda Rhimes show, gets a seasonal best for having a sad but realistic lesbian storyline starring Marie Jean-Baptiste (many will remember the British actress from her long stint as an FBI agent on Without a Trace, and for her role in the award-winning film Secrets and Lies) as a lesbian journalist with a partner on life-support. ("Allie was the love of my life, and I felt that way for 10 years, every single day. I'm afraid if I let her go, I will never be loved again.") Jean-Baptiste was so magnificent. As she finally found the courage to take her partner off life-support, she murmured, "Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being the love of my life." Heartbreakingly good.
Private Practice also had a storyline this season following one of the central characters as she carried a baby who had developed in utero without a brain. The complexity of the story �" the character is a neurosurgeon and also had been a drug addict, and thus blamed herself for the anomaly �" involved the morality of bringing a child with an irreversible deformity into the world just to cull its organs. It was also heartbreakingly compelling, although it left the viewer with questions we'd rather not have to answer.
We would also give one of our limited short-term bests to The Vampire Diaries for their incredible season finale, which was gruesome beyond belief �" a mass execution of the hybrids as Christmas carols played in the background �" but amazingly good. (It will play a little differently post-Connecticut, we think, but nevertheless, fabulous.)
Worst brats
TV is a broad landscape, and it's easy to target The Worsts of the tube, because, well, that's what cable's for. But some things stand out for us. Let's call TLC (it used to be The Learning Channel; no more) a worst in and of itself. But Here Comes Honey Boo Boo may be the worst reality show for turning a family of talentless people into celebrities, then constantly slamming them for being talentless celebrities. Ugh.
Another worst goes to daytime TV for being incapable of creating real and lasting LGBT characters or storylines on any of the soaps. A storyline was started on Bold & Beautiful �" the first in its 25-year history, and the show is about the fashion industry in LA! �" and then immediately dropped. Days of Our Lives has a gay storyline between Will and Sonny, but it almost never surfaces. And Young & the Restless and General Hospital: nothing. So: a big fat worst for you.
There are also a lot of worsts among sitcoms this season: Guys with Kids, Partners, Malibu Country and yes, Ryan Murphy's The New Normal. These shows stereotype gay men, people of color and women in the worst ways possible. Dreadful. Partners was cancelled, as we predicted. Alas, the others are still going.
We also want to call out yet again for worst of the year the CSI and Law & Order franchises for never having a main character in a single one of their ensembles who is queer, despite having about 100 seasons among them. This week's episode of CSI just tossed a gay couple into the murder mystery with no regard for character, development or emotion. It was outrageously homophobic, yet one could tell that the writers thought it was great.
Jerry Springer gets a worst in his 20th season this year for continuing to spotlight the worst of America's LGBT community: the lying, manipulative "trannies," as they call themselves and each other, the vicious queens, the not-really-lesbian lesbians.
Finally, our worst of the year goes to all the men out there in America who are stockpiling guns and treating Americans to regular mass murders like the one in Connecticut on Dec. 14. Even President Obama, usually calm and controlled in any national crisis, had to stop and compose himself and wipe away a tear as he spoke out that afternoon about the shooting of 20 little kids and several adults in an elementary school.
Of course this is what TV does best, bringing us news of disastrous events as they happen. But as some Americans were still celebrating Hanukkah and others were preparing for Christmas, the parents of all those dead children would be going home to houses with holiday gifts that would never, ever be opened. There's no news video for that.
And so, as the year draws to a close with yet another series of heartbreaking, gut-churning, sob-inducing images brought to us in real time via the tube, we might want to listen to what the President said on that otherwise beautiful winter afternoon: This must stop.
So for the terrible, incomprehensible, horrifying events that take us to the depths of human depravity, as well as for the wonderful, engaging, compelling shows that keep us entertained and thoughtful throughout the rest of the year, remember: you really must stay tuned.