Finding Roger: An Improbably Theatrical Love Story by Rick Elice; Kingswell, $26.99
It's often been said that one criterion to judge the success of a person's life is by how much love they inspired in others. If that is the marker of accomplishment, then the life of actor Roger Rees can be said to have been a blockbuster. "Finding Roger," written by Roger's partner and husband of 33 years, playwright/author Rick Elice, is both a tribute and heartbreaking love letter. Rees died on July 10, 2015, at age 71, of the same brain cancer currently plaguing Senator John McCain. He underwent treatments for about a year before his death, but managed to perform on Broadway in the musical "The Visit," co-starring Chita Rivera, up until two months before he died. Americans knew him best from two memorable TV appearances: as Robin Colcord on "Cheers," and as Lord John Marbury on "The West Wing." But the theater was his first love. Five days after he died, the marquee lights of all Broadway theaters were fittingly dimmed in his honor.
But Rees' life off the stage was as dramatic as any play. Rees was a good, decent man, known by his friends as Rog. He also was part of a beautiful devoted gay love story with Elice. "Finding Roger" starts with what Elice calls "The Roger Reports," journal entries begun a week before Rees passed away, the first one a long email sent out to family and friends detailing Rees' fight with glioblastoma. "He's been struggling with it since October, when on a beautiful fall day, he started walking into people and things, and our lives changed forever. There is no cure."
After his death, Elice continues the entries as a way to process his broken heart, profound loss, and "the shape-shifting immediacy of despair." Elice's grief is penetrating and at first inconsolable, but eventually leads to the healing gift of memory and thankfulness.
Their passionate affair did not have an auspicious beginning. Rees' greatest triumph as an actor was his performance in London and Broadway as the title character in Dickens' "The Life and Adventures of Nicholas Nickleby," a massive Royal Shakespeare Company 8+ hour production spread over several days that won Rees a Tony Award and, when it was adapted for television by A&E, an Emmy nomination. It also was when he met Elice. Elice, a struggling actor fresh out of Yale Drama School, was ticked off that the play was not hiring any Americans, and even went to Actor's Equity wanting to start a committee to keep British actors out of Broadway. But his friend Kate Burton (daughter of Richard) told him that he had to go see it, as it would change his life. He balked at the $100 ticket price, but, borrowing the money from his father, he did attend the play, and was smitten by Rees, even sending him a mash note, though he received no response.
Almost a year later, writing ad copy for "Cats," he saw Rees visiting the director Trevor Nunn, who directed "Nickleby." Summoning his courage, he asked him to dinner. Hesitant at first, Rees relented, and it became an all-night, once-in-a-lifetime experience. But Rees returned immediately to London to star in Tom Stoppard's play "The Right Thing." They continued to write, and Elice traveled to London, even meeting Rees' mother. After three years of long-distance love, they set up "ecstatic domesticity," at first in London, later in New York.
In the early 80s, Rees was becoming an alcoholic. Drunk one night, he drove home with Elice, arguing about his drinking, and they almost plunged into the Thames River off the Albert Bridge. Rees totally blacked out the incident the next day, but it inspired him to stop using alcohol. Rees converted to Judaism (Elice's religion) and became an essential part of Elice's big family. They married in 2011, and collaborated on two plays Elice wrote: "Peter and the Starcatcher," about Peter Pan; and the thriller "Double Double." Rees starred in both.
"Finding Roger" is a memoir highlighting some of Rees' top moments, both professionally and privately. At times it reads like a long eulogy, including friends' speeches at the memorial service held at Broadway's New Amsterdam Theater, two months after he died. There are also tribute letters from Kathleen Turner, Jeremy Irons, Dame Judi Dench, writer Charles Busch, Tommy Tune, and Sir Kenneth Branagh, among many others.