I grew up in the 1970s, and my youth was very different from the world of today. It was an era of feminism and the Equal Rights Amendment, of the fight for gay rights in a time of Anita Bryant and the Briggs initiative, of Renee Richards, and of Flip Wilson performing as Geraldine on his eponymous television show.
One of my earliest memories �" my mom would place this when I was 3 �" was wanting Mary Janes instead of sneakers, and her dissuading me from this choice. Actually, she told me I could have them, but only once I learned to tie my sneakers' laces. I spent a lot of time trying to learn after that, but still never managed to earn that pair of shoes. I suspect she had hoped I'd forget.
It being the holiday season, I am also reminded of asking for things like Barbie dolls or an Easy Bake Oven, doing my best to rationalize my choices �" the Barbie, for example, was to be the girlfriend of all the Big Jim dolls that Santa Claus left under the tree for me. My subterfuge never worked.
The other thing the holidays remind me of is the last time I ever made a New Year's resolution. This was near the end of the decade, and by then I'd learned what it was to be transgender. Not only that there were people out there like me, and that steps could be taken to allow me to be a girl �" and eventually a woman �" but that actually voicing my desires would be shameful and hurtful to my family and me.
I resolved, as 1977 turned to 1978, that I would never feel these feelings again. No longer would I believe myself to be the wrong gender. That resolution lasted mere moments before it was broken.
A great many years have now passed since the era of disco and mood rings. Today is a different world. Feminism is still in the forefront during the "war on women" foisted upon us all, the struggle for overturning the Defense of Marriage Act and Proposition 8 keep the battle for same-sex marriage in the forefront of the LGBT movement. Recently, the vice president of the United States of America called transgender discrimination the "civil rights issue of our time."
An author named Robyn Serven penned a piece about a mother and her 5-year-old child, Sam. Sam likes zebras, and when his mom took Sam out to get shoes for his very first day of school, Sam picked out a pair of pink, zebra-striped ballet flats. After some hemming and hawing, Sam's mother agreed, and Sam got his zebra shoes. A photo of Sam, on Facebook, ignited a firestorm. Adults �" including his own great aunt �" mocked Sam and his mother. Sam's mom has stood firm though: he can wear whatever footwear he chooses.
Meanwhile, a young woman named McKenna Pope started an online petition. Her little brother likes cooking, but modern day Easy Bake ovens only come in purple and pink, and only feature young women in the advertising. Pope started an online petition to ask Hasbro to make a gender neutral Easy Bake Oven, eventually gaining over 45,000 signatures. Hasbro has responded, and plans to launch a new line of gender-neutral ovens and feature young men in their ads as well as young women.
Finally, there is the story of Josie Romero, an 11-year-old living in Arizona. She was recently featured on a news story called "Living A Transgender Childhood" on Dateline NBC. Aside from the piece falling into a lot of familiar transgender tropes, as well as one segment that focused all too much on reinforcing female stereotypes in Romero, the piece did a good job of showing the life of a young transgender woman in today's world.
All of the above stories, to me, are exciting. While Sam may only be into his shoes for the zebra stripes, and Pope's little brother may only be into cooking, both show a willingness on behalf of their mother or sister, respectively, to look beyond gender expectations, to consider that maybe this isn't necessarily a bad thing for their child.
In Romero's case we go even a further step. While her parents were reluctant, they've gone ahead and done what they can to help their child. She is living in her preferred gender, and medical intervention is helping to delay her puberty. Presumably, she will eventually opt for hormone treatment and surgery, and go on to live her life as a woman.
The avenues these kids have open to them, today, are far beyond anything I could have dreamed possible back in my own youth. We now are living in a time when these kids can go beyond the essentialism of "boys wear blue and girls wear pink" that has become so ingrained in our society over the last many decades. They can approach their own parents and �" if they're lucky �" find a sympathetic ear that will help them.
This, to me, is what the transgender movement is about. Yes, we're here to gain equality, to fight discrimination, to right wrongs �" but we should do these things to make the way easier for those who come after us, no matter how they decide to interpret gender. Perhaps they'll reinterpret it as a continuum of thousands of genders, or one �" or none. Perhaps, like Romero, they'll happily have the childhood and womanhood that I would have dearly loved. Either way, those of us who were there then should be able to smile about any small part we may have had in making that happen.
Gwen Smith never did get an Easy Bake Oven. You can find her on the web at www.gwensmith.com.