Drag to riches

  • by Jim Piechota
  • Wednesday July 4, 2018
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Blame It on Bianca Del Rio by Bianca Del Rio; Dey Street Press, $21.99

As the winner of the sixth season of "RuPaul's Drag Race" and the queen of her own expanding empire, insult comedienne extraordinaire Bianca Del Rio's (aka Roy Haylock) latest venture is a companion piece to her current comedy tour of the same name. The artfully packaged pseudo-advice book "Blame It on Bianca Del Rio" is framed around Bianca's call for fan letters, and while the questions may be somewhat standard fare, Del Rio's answers are anything but. Sharp-tongued, with a heavy dose of black humor and good-natured attitude (if there is indeed such a thing), she doles out the tough love and barely breaks a sweat or bats a 301 false eyelash. But fair warning: if you are hypersensitive about everything and easily offended, this is definitely not the book for you.

Though her season of "Drag Race" has long since come and gone, the outspoken social critic still admits to remaining somewhat of a household name, "at least in the houses of gay men, fag hags, and parents who keep wondering why their teenage son, Billy, doesn't have a girlfriend, yet seems to know a lot about contouring." In an effort to answer the emails, letters, and Facebook posts she regularly receives about everything from a "stinky snatch" to "integrity bullshit" to the best places to relocate, Bianca spits out the truth in a give-and-take session of "your needy questions and my bitter, unqualified responses." Ever the equal opportunity offender, Del Rio doesn't disappoint.

The first section deals with folks' queasiness around larger-sized "tubby" children, troubles with hiding acne (apply foundation "with a trowel"), and hilariously counterproductive counsel for those looking for love, romance, or friends ("people who hold your hair when you vomit"). Perhaps the funniest part, a brassy, penis-heavy chapter on sex called "You're the Top!," concludes with a short list of Bianca's favorite fetishes.

She answers plenty of candid questions on manners, work relations, and avoiding pooping while traveling by air ("on days when I fly, I have Imodium for breakfast, a butt plug for lunch, and I douche with Glade"). In response to a question about dishonesty and integrity, Bianca shoves our current political administration right into the fire pit without hesitation, opining that "Donald Trump lies every 3.7 seconds. It doesn't bother him in the least, and it doesn't bother his family either."

The book is also loaded with full-color photographs of Bianca in her glossy, glittery, professionally-costumed, smug-scowling splendor, in all sorts of compromising positions and situations.

Brilliantly hilarious, politically incorrect (to put it mildly), and supremely offensive to every color, creed, and community imaginable, Bianca Del Rio's brusque bitchfest is a must-have for fans and a must-buy for the few remaining stragglers who haven't heard of her and need a good laugh at everyone else's expense.