"But Auntie Mame, it's one week from Thanksgiving Day now," sings Little Patrick in "We Need a Little Christmas" from the musical Mame. And so it is: one week from Thanksgiving Day now. Missy Dennis wants to hurry-up the holidays to offset depressions, of both the big-D and little-d varieties, and maybe some theatrical merriment can provide distraction from any big-R recession blues. Either that, or a stack of the new eggnog-flavored pancakes at your local IHOP.

Brava Theatre Center is first out of the seasonal gate with a solo play that doesn't necessarily promise a sugar rush. On the Rocks, written and performed by Rachel Parker, is a journey through her dark and comic life as seen through her family's annual Christmas rituals. On the Rocks is part of Brava's Me, Myself & I series that also includes solo works by D'Lo, Jeanne Haynes, and Anthem Salgado. Various combinations of the four pieces will be performed through Dec. 3. Call 647-2822 or go to www.brava.org.

Paula Vogel, best-known for the disturbing How I Learned to Drive, gets into the holiday spirit, albeit a holiday with heady complications, in A Civil War Christmas that TheatreWorks is staging in Palo Alto's Lucie Stern Theatre on Dec. 2-27. Set in Washington, DC, in 1864, the play brings together historical figures, composites, and imaginary characters, along with traditional holiday songs, as they find various ways to cope with the dark mood spun by the ongoing Civil War as Christmas Day approaches. Tickets at (650) 463-1960 or www.theatreworks.org.

The irrepressible Sean Owens, the Exit Theatre's writer/performer-in-residence, returns as Cora Values, proprietress of the Gas & Gulp, in a new show set in the off-ramp eatery. The audience at each performance of Cora's Holiday Hotpad, running Dec. 3-12, will help Cora and her cafe regulars choose how the storytelling and musical interludes (includi

Jackie Beat helps get the Rrazz Room into the Yuletide spirit with her latest show. Photo: Fausto Fernes

ng the holiday classic "My Solstice With Burned-Up Walter") will proceed. Reservations at 673-3847 or www.theexit.org.

Another recidivistic holiday tradition is a Jackie Beat engagement at the Rrazz Room. This year, Alcoholidays is on the agenda for Dec. 3-5, and the drag diva will also offer an updated version of "Biggest Hits of the Year MedleyÓ that recalls the most ubiquitous songs of 2009. The Rrazz Room is also home this year to Donna Sachet's 17th annual Songs of the Season, on Nov. 30-Dec. 2. The show, featuring such guest stars as Sharon McKnight, Bill Bunn, and Connie Champagne, benefits the AIDS Emergency Fund. More info at www.therrazzroom.com.

It's the eighth year for the Combined Artform and Beck-n-Call production of David Sedaris' The Santaland Diaries. John Michael Beck and David Sinaiko share the role of Crumpet the Elf, a character based on Sedaris' own experiences working the Santa detail at Macy's. Performances are Dec. 5-30 at the Off-Market Theatre. Call 336-0513 or go to www.combinedartform.com.

The Richmond/Ermet AIDS Foundation, presenter of the long-running Help Is on the Way concert series, is moving to a new venue for its One Night Only Holiday Cabaret on Dec. 7. Patty Duke and Teal Wicks, from the SF production of Wicked, Lucie Arnaz, RJ Helton, Leanne Borghesi, and Connie Champagne are among the performers taking to the stage at J'LaChic Theatre 39 on Pier 39. Tickets at 273-1630 or www.helpisontheway.org.

Katya Smirnoff-Skyy, the trilling exiled Russian countess, returns to New Conservatory Theatre Center with a new "holiday spectacular." Belting, banter and ball gowns are promised in J. Conrad Frank's alter-ego performance, running Dec. 9-Jan. 2. Call 861-8972 or go to www.nctcsf.org.

Theatre Rhino and Word for Word again join forces to present a staged reading of Truman Capote's A Christmas Memory. The Dec. 14 production this year takes place at Z Space/Word for Word's new home at Theatre Artaud, as Rhino offers its first production since leaving its long-time home on 16th Street. Call 626-0453 or go to www.zspace.org.

The Coverlettes Cover Christmas was designed as a one-off attraction last year, but proved so popular that the Aurora Theatre ordered up an encore. The revised version, created by Aurora Artistic Director Tom Ross and performers Darby Gould, Katie Guthorn, and Carol Bozzio Littleton, imagines a reunion of a bee-hived girl group and features a jukebox-worth of 1960s pop. Info at (510) 843-4822 or www.auroratheatre.org.

Kung Pao Kosher Comedy is back for its 17th annual evening of Jewish comedy in a Chinese restaurant at Christmas. On this year's bill are Jonathan Katz, Brian Malow, Hilary Schwartz, and impressaria Lisa Geduldig. There will be cocktail and dinner shows at the New Asia Restaurant on Dec. 24-27. Call (925) 275-9005 or go to www.koshercomedy.com.

Penny's thoughts

Performance artist Penny Arcade returns to SF with her new show New York Values. The veteran of the downtown NYC arts scene now has Bourgeois Bohemians in her crosshairs as she rants, dances, and exudes the demimonde that has defined her iconoclastic life and times.

Seen last season at Brava in Bitch! Dyke! Faghag! Whore!, Penny Arcade will be in residence at the Marsh's Upstairs Studio on Nov. 20-22 with her up-yours to gentrified arts, neighborhoods, and rebels. Call 826-5750 or go to www.themarsh.org.

Richard Dodds can be reached at BARstage@comcast.net.